So the Toffs of Ewingsdale are in fear of the imminent invasion of old people.
Poor souls, imagine the increase in crime – the misfortune of suffering graffiti written in the finest of the Queen’s English without the aid of spell check. The constant theft of tea bags and the illegal trafficking of viagra.
How could us simple Plebs from Suffolk Park not sympathise with your frustrations? We had an OP (old people) zoning slapped on us years ago without community consultation and are constantly returning slippers, pipes and unregistered walkers to their forgetful owners.
Let’s hope future generations are more compassionate when your ‘use by date’ approaches and haven’t adopted the ‘open land fill’ solution. Rest assured that site shall never be built on due to the unstable foundations.
Despite the mayor’s recent backflip rest assured when the corks are popping and the ribbons need cutting his melon will be in front of every flashing camera.
Jeff Barnes, Suffolk Park (home to the old folk)
