Brian Mollet
The arctic ice maidens flayed the hallowed turf of Lomath Oval without mercy for the toss of the coin in the Nick Shand Memorial cricket series on Sunday.
Scruff of the Left Bankers coaxing his compatriots from their armoured compounds to take on the dome-dwelling post-neo hippies of Main Arm.
Scruff called correctly and was happy to send the Armers into the chilly expanses of the outfield.
Russ and Leon opened for the Bankers and played well to keep out the very curly Greg-O and Khan who charged in like a Mongol horseman downbreeze.
The Main Arm effort early was hard to fault, Dan (1–11) and Dustin creating chances but it seemed lady luck was to show them nothing but the royal butt-cheeks.
After a few practice swings Leon (30) found the sweet spot, Eli (34), Scruff and Bruce (42) then began to trample the bowling and only a late flurry from Rick (2–20) and ‘the central scrutiniser’ Brian (2–15) prevented a rout.
When the casualties had been counted the Left Bankers were standing out hard and proud on 192.
The Bankers got into gear from the first over, Blake enjoying the feel of the new cherry and the wind over his shoulder, and Russell, Guy and Leon (2–9) heaped on the early pressure.
The Armers tried everything including prayer but the last time they saw some decent runs was the stockmarket crash.
At 5–37 the hill-dwelling Lefties were in cruise mode and living up to the Bankers’ credo: borrow at one, loan at two, home by three.
Rod, Sean, Eli (2–4) and Gaz (2–14) all gorged on the lower order and if not for Brian’s hanging around long enough to be mildly annoying and Eden (23 n/o) hitting defiantly the Armers would have been truly ‘pantsed’.
The Bankers are still undefeated in the series, which pauses for next week, so many of the players apparently having splinters in their arses.
The following Sunday sees the battle of the beach boys as the Byron Bay Full-Tossers meet the Suffolk Park Swingers.
