Mandy Nolan’s Soapbox: What really happened to Prince Charming

Last week King Charles prayed with Pope Leo. It was the first time in 500 years, since the royals split with the Catholics so Henry could divorce his wife.

Divorced, beheaded, died, divorced, beheaded, survived. That was the fate of Henry’s six wives. That’s what you do when you are powerful and you don’t like the rules. You create a world where the rules suit you. I wondered what was said, as the King and the Pope quietly knelt together in the Sistine Chapel – did Charles lean into Leo and whisper, ‘Can you guys take Andrew back? Pleeease. We don’t want him.’ To which Leo replied. ‘Not even God wants him, Charles’.

Prince Andrew is the bloodstain on the doona of privilege that will never wash clean. He is a reminder of what entitlement to undeserved wealth and status does to a person. The sense that you are exceptionalised. That the rules that apply to the rest of us don’t apply to you. That you are special. That you deserve more. Not because of anything you have done, are doing, or will do. But just because you exist. Because your parents and their parents and all that came before were part of a bloodline that lived in golden castles built from the bodies of peasants. Us. Built from us. Stolen from us. And cleaned, maintained and paid for, by us.

As you can no doubt tell, I am not a fan of the monarchy. And I am certainly not a fan of Andrew.

Andrew, we have just found out has spent the last 20 years living in the Royal Lodge. It is owned by the Crown Estate. So in theory, income generated is paid into the UK Consolidated Fund, where it is added to funds arising from general taxation and then available to Treasury for the benefit of the nation. So when Epstein’s royal ‘fixer’ has managed to score 20 years paying a ‘peppercorn’ rent – and only payable if requested, it can only be assumed that a decent sum of money has not gone back into the public purse.

If conservatively the Royal Lodge could have been rented for 10,000 pounds a week, over 20 years, that’s about ten million pounds missing in action. Right now in the UK there are 8.5 million people who can’t access the housing they need. This includes 2 million children living in overcrowded, unaffordable or unsuitable homes. Meanwhile Prince Andrew is living in a 30-room mansion paying next to nothing. And it’s not like he’s working for the crown. He’s not even allowed near a morning tea.

He was stripped of his royal patronages in 2022 after a US judge allowed a civil sexual abuse case against him to move to trial. He was also stripped of his title of Colonel of the Grenadier Guards, one of the oldest regiments in the British Army. He can no longer use HRH. And has voluntarily given up all royal titles, except ‘prince’. He’s hanging on to that one.

He’s been on a ₤1 million annual allowance from his family until last year, when the King cut it, so now all he’s got is his ₤20,000-a-year naval pension. So maybe it’s time he put his name down for council housing. Although it might take a while. There’s currently just under 1.5 million people on the wait list. In the meantime Prince Andrew might need to get a room in a London sharehouse. On his naval pension, paying 250 quid a week is gonna be tight, and to be honest, I don’t know if anyone is going to live with a 65-year-old who was best buds with Jeffrey Epstein, the man accused of paedophilia, sex abuse and sex trafficking. And then there are the allegations against Andrew of sexual abuse all detailed in the posthumous release of a book by the brave Virginia Giuffre. Who died from suicide earlier this year.

So privilege be damned. It’s time for justice. Maybe it’s time Epstein’s favourite prince felt the power of the pavement.

• The Echo’s coverage of political issues will remain as comprehensive and fair as it has ever been, outside this opinion column which, as always, contains Mandy’s personal opinions only.