Hello, my name is Percy Concrete and I live in Ballina. In fact, you’ll find me everywhere there. Ballina Council is in love with me, and they’re keen to have more of me.
I often hang out with my close associate Burnie Bitumen. Council is a bit naughty, it has its way spreading Burnie around too. I do get a bit jealous because they often dress him up with lots of kinky white paint seemingly just to show him off and really make him stand out.
For some strange reason other councils like to dress their roads up with plants and street trees! But Ballina Council knows better. It really leads the way in doing roads without that pointless median landscaping – it’s just such a distraction.
Take a look at my latest appearance in Kerr Street in Ballina. I’m clean, I’m bold and I have a real macho look. I like the way I kinda stretch out forever and then nicely come together with River Street in an absolute climax of beautiful concrete harmony. I can also make myself available in Kerr Street to do an emergency strip if required for the Ballina airport crew.
I do know that plants help to keep the urban environment cool – but who wants that? I love it hot, and so does Burnie.
Some people criticise me for burning so much energy when I’m made. They say that I contribute to a warming planet, whereas plants used in landscaping take carbon out of the atmosphere. I don’t think Council’s engineers worry about that though. They love me so much and they won’t stop using me until Ballina is fully covered in concrete. Won’t that be lovely!
And a special shout out to those gorgeous councillors who have ideas of using me in a pool on the rock shelf at Shelly Beach. How beautifully romantic – I’d love that. The crew at Council has already laid me, a lot, around Shelly Beach. I match the beachside setting so well, don’t you think?
I do hope that Council continues our affair forever, and I’d like to make myself available to everyone in the Shire. Let’s do it in your home, your factory, or your commercial premises. Let’s further cement Ballina’s place as the concrete capital of the eastern seaboard.
Clever Percy!
Very unclever. What would you prefer?. Hemp fibre is great, maybe you can put it to good use.