Old Man Shouts At Cloud #5
Apart from organic shiraz, my latest investment in health is this mini-stepper, or ‘massage stepper’ as they call it in the country of origin.
I was pleased to discover it works and is easy to use. It can be used on a daily basis and is especially handy for those days when it is too hot or too cold outside or it seems too far to the front door.
Oh the delights!
An extra enjoyment I did not expect is the owner’s manual, with sentences such as this: ‘It would produce an effect of conduction to human body by stimulating the refection ZONES, in another, word it would be much helpful to our health if we can walk with BARE FEET as possible we can.’
The reflexology chart for the feet is very detailed. I’ll be hammering the genitalia regions on the heel as much as possible for help with my insomnig [sic].
The device has a tiny computer powered by a triple A battery. It tells you how many steps you have taken and how many calories you have burned. With my already light frame I can’t afford to burn too many calories or I’ll become a bushfire of dispersed molecules.
Mini-steppers are a big thing on YouTube, if you want to see one in action. Be careful, though, there are people who do full-body workouts for a terrifying 20 minutes.
Now, where’s that glass of shiraz?