Brenda Matthews, a Wiradjuri woman, and her six siblings were removed from her parents in 1973; Brenda was two, and her eldest sister eight.
Brenda was placed with a family near Sydney and her siblings were placed in other foster families and institutions.
Yet they are not considered part of the stolen generations because they were removed four years after the Aborigines Protection Act was repealed in New South Wales. Therefore, she and her siblings are not entitled to any compensation or recognition for what happened to them and their family.
‘The Act changed but they didn’t,’ she told The Echo.
Five years to get children returned
It took Brenda’s parents five years to get all their children returned. They had been living out west but decided to move to Newcastle to fight for their children.
‘Mum and dad fought hard to get all their children back,’ said Brenda.
‘They managed to get them back, two by two, over a period of five or six years. There were five girls and my eldest sister was eight when she was removed and gone for three years.’
Brenda says when she was finally returned to her parents, ‘I felt like they looked like a family. I felt like I was intruding on their family. I didn’t know that my siblings had also been taken away at that time. We never really talked about it, it was too hurtful.’
Brenda’s search for her white family led to the book and then making of The Last Daughter, where she explores the challenges and experience of finding her white family and bringing her two families together.
Since 2012 Brenda and her husband Mark have been hosting cultural camps, taking teenagers on Country.
Reconnection
‘Me and my husband did culture camps where I started sharing my story. And sharing my story became what it is now,’ she told The Echo.
‘Sharing story in our culture has been around for a long time. Sharing my truth, my story, that’s what we do,’ explained Brenda.
Through exploring her story Brenda was finally able to find and reunite with her foster parents, Mac and Connie Ockers, 40 years after she was returned to her birth parents.
‘Returning to my white family was scary at first, because I was frightened that they didn’t want to know me or they didn’t want anything to do with me. But when I overcame the fear and reached out, I realised that they had been looking for me too. And it was amazing when I did return.
‘They are awesome people, and the love and acceptance my white mum and dad have shown and continue to show me is beautiful. I’m so grateful they accepted me into their family, that day back in 1973.’
By reconnecting with her white family and bringing her two sets of parents together she was able to create healing and understanding.
‘Recreating the scene of mum and dad having their children being taken away, sharing out of love and forgiveness, has brought the healing I have needed. For me to understand my story, truthfully, and out of love for both sides.
‘I think people can relate to it. It is not just my story, it’s a universal story – the hurt and pain – I realised reconciliation had to start with myself. I brought my parents on both sides together and there was reconciliation within themselves. We were all hurt, and we can all be healed through telling our stories.’
Brenda is a mother, a grandmother, a storyteller, a writer, a speaker, an Indigenous director and co-founder for Learning Circle Australia, and she is hoping that ‘others can walk with me on this journey’.
‘We start with ourselves and our own stories – who am I, where are we going as individuals? Then, where are we going as a nation? It seems to be such a divisive story at the moment, we have to ask “where is home” and find the answer within. Humans can relate to that. We all have a story that ties us to this country. We can all be part of carrying the healing story into the future for the next generation,’ she said.
If you would like to bring together a group or the mob to watch The Last Daughter you can get a licence through Fanforce or go onto The Last Daughter website (www.thelastdaughter.com.au) to arrange a private screening. Or find it on Netflix where it was released on 3 July. The book is available at bookshops and via Brenda’s website: www.brendamatthews.com.au.
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